Typos

[kyuubee]

not sure if it's a typo but the first thaloren talent sometimes is referenced as 'wrath of the woods' and sometimes as 'wrath of the eternals'

http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/86 ... rd01q.png/

[tiger_eye]

greycat, much of those changes are very good, and I really like the change from passive to active tense. Some of the changes, though, are a little more subjective, and either version could be used in my opinion. For a few of the changes, though, I'm not fond of either the original or the modified text.

Regarding semicolons, the one in the "Mindslayer" text is a must, and the one in "Paradox Now!" is good too.

Regarding the skeleton text, I believe you're both grammatically incorrect, although I will readily admit it is a tricky sentence. The revised semicolon is in the wrong place, and I think a colon should be the preferred choice (in the correct place):

The marching bones, each step we rattle, but servants no more: we march to battle!

I don't like either version of the High Peak text as a yeek. Here is my suggested mofidication:

Your sacrifice worked: your mental energies imbued with farportal energies, and The Way radiated from the High Peak toward the rest of Eyal like a mental tidal wave.

I also think the original and modified texts for these were a little funky and could maybe warrant being revisited: Archmage, Arena (challenge of the master), Deep Bellow (escape from Reknor), lumberjack-cursed (the beast within), and Paradoxology.

A semi-colon is a dry grammatical instrument, and though it is of wondrous use in essays it should not be applied to poetic text.

Huh? Semicolons have been used frequently in poetry for a long time. It does not look so different from a comma, and poor grammar can detract from many types of poetry. Unless there is a good reason not to, proper english should generally be adhered to (dangling preposition aside ). For example, here is a line from The Rime of the Ancient Mariner by Samuel Taylor Coleridge:

The helmsman steered, the ship moved on; / Yet never a breeze up blew

Oh, one more thing, I think the Mage-Apprentice text is currently correct and doesn't need a comma.

I appreciate your desire for grammatical correctness (and an immense job you've done in hunting out many errors) but it can interfere with poetic colour. I think there should be some separation of typos (what are clearly mistakes) and real changes to the text. The former should be included without question, whilst the latter should be more open to discussion.

Another good guideline to adhere to .

[greycat]

Wow. Even grammar mistake corrections are controversial now.

I wonder why I even bother trying.

[Grey]

Well, what exactly about changing "Prove yourself worthy to enter." to "Prove yourself worthy!" is a grammar correction? Perhaps you like the sound of the former better, but it certainly goes beyond the remit of typo correction.

Don't get me wrong, I think you've done a fantastic job with finding and correcting so many mistakes (and there are many, and they do need fixing) - it's very much appreciated by everyone. But there needs to be a clear separation to correcting obvious mistakes and changing meaning or style.

The semi-colon stuff is probably me being fussy, mind :/ Though I'll admit I like tiger_eye's colon (and not just because that sounds funny out of context).

[Grey]

A semi-colon is a dry grammatical instrument, and though it is of wondrous use in essays it should not be applied to poetic text.

Huh? Semicolons have been used frequently in poetry for a long time. It does not look so different from a comma, and poor grammar can detract from many types of poetry. Unless there is a good reason not to, proper english should generally be adhered to (dangling preposition aside :wink: ).

Bleh, screw proper English ;) I'll admit I can be a grammar fiend myself at times, but when it comes to creative text the same rules don't apply. Especially with the locked descriptions, which are meant to be cryptic clues about what the unlock is for. For instance I think "Blood spilled on sand, only the strong survive." is all the better for not being grammatically correct. The very rebellion against the laws of grammar can add a note of mystery to the text.

Of course that makes it a harder job for those seeking to correct grammar across a wide range of texts in the game :(

[greycat]

I appreciate your desire for grammatical correctness (and an immense job you've done in hunting out many errors) but it can interfere with poetic colour.
...
Well, what exactly about changing "Prove yourself worthy to enter." to "Prove yourself worthy!" is a grammar correction?

- locked_desc = "Blood spilled on sand, only the strong survive. Prove yourself worthy to enter.",
+ locked_desc = "Blood spills on the sand. Only the strong can survive. Prove yourself worthy!",

I find it ironic that I am criticized for "interfering with poetic colour" if I dare get even the tiniest bit creative and try to add some of my own.

[Grey]

Well, you are rewriting someone else's text and passing it through a typo correction post. Seems inappropriate to me. If you want to make a creative correction state so clearly (as you did with the Linaniil stuff in the past), and then it's up to DarkGod to decide what he wants in. Like I've said, there needs to be disparity between simple typo corrections and more subjective changes to the text.

[Hedrachi]

Not to cut this lively discussion short, but another typo in timed_effects.lua (line 3215):

Code: Select all

on_lose = function(self, err) return "#Target# has regained it's natural age." end,

Should read:

Code: Select all

on_lose = function(self, err) return "#Target# has regained its natural age." end,

[madmonk]

Ah, yes... The aberrant apostrophe!

[jotwebe]

Greynot's Analysis of the Races Chapter 8: Sher'Tul, right at the start:

"... but the facts are few, as so little is known about this crucible race."

crucible (plural crucibles)

1. (chemistry) A cup-shaped piece of laboratory equipment used to contain chemical compounds when heating them to very high temperatures.
2. A heat-resistant container in which metals are melted, usually at temperatures above 500°C, commonly made of graphite with clay as a binder.
3. The bottom and hottest part of a blast furnace; the hearth.
4. A very difficult and trying experience, that acts as a refining or hardening process.

What you want here (I think) is crucial:

crucial (comparative more crucial, superlative most crucial)

1. Being essential or decisive for determining the outcome or future of something; extremely important.
   The battle of Tali-Ihantala in 1944 is one of the crucial moments in the history of Finland.
   A secure supply of crude oil is crucial for any modern nation, let alone a superpower.
   
2. (archaic) Cruciform or cruciate; cross-shaped.
3. (slang, chiefly Jamaica) Term of approval, particularly when applied to reggae music.
   Delbert Wilkins is the most crucial pirate radio DJ in Brixton.

[Grey]

No no no NOOOOOOO!!!!!

Sorry, this has come up before on another lore post, and ended up getting changed to "ancient". I deliberately snuck the word back in on this piece because I thought that was very wrong. Whilst most dictionaries seem to only hold the literal meaning of the word, it does have other uses in literature. It is an analogical word implied a period or situation of extreme forces, in fantasy especially referring to and early age of raw powers. Check out the third listing here:

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/crucible

Also consider the famous play "The Crucible" - it was not about melting pots (well, not in the literal sense).

[Hedrachi]

Still awkward: The Sher'Tul are not a place, time, nor are they a situation. Mayhap a change to "but the facts are few, as so little is known about this crucible era." would better suit this lore entry?

[Grey]

They don't have to be an era to be described as crucible. It's no different than describing a species as "Jurassic".

In any case, words are more interesting when used in interesting ways. And who is to comment on the writing style of the people of Maj'Eyal, hmm? ;)

[jotwebe]

Still awkward: The Sher'Tul are not a place, time, nor are they a situation. Mayhap a change to "but the facts are few, as so little is known about this crucible era." would better suit this lore entry?

They don't have to be an era to be described as crucible. It's no different than describing a species as "Jurassic".

You guys are missing the point. Crucible is a NOUN. You're using it as an ADJECTIVE.

I've no problem with you refering to the Sher'Tul Wars as "a crucible for the mortal races" or something, but I think crucial with the first meaning "Being essential or decisive for determining the outcome or future of something; extremely important" would make a lot of sense, besides being grammatically correct.

In any case, words are more interesting when used in interesting ways. And who is to comment on the writing style of the people of Maj'Eyal, hmm?

If it were a style, with at least lore text by the same author containing characteristic and systematic errors (or idiosyncrasies, if you wish), okay. But isolated as it is, what it looks like is that the real author mixed up "crucible" and "crucial" due to the words sounding similar and having somewhat related meanings. YOu could go and say that Loremaster Greynot is supposed to have made that mistake, but as he is a scholar, I think that is not the best characterisation. Or, you could just go and change it already.

[madmonk]

It is an analogical word implied a period or situation of extreme forces, in fantasy especially referring to and early age of raw powers. Check out the third listing here:

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/crucible

Sorry to butt in but under your definition we have (my bold):

cru·ci·ble (krs-bl)
n.
1. A vessel made of a refractory substance such as graphite or porcelain, used for melting and calcining materials at high temperatures.
2. A severe test, as of patience or belief; a trial. See Synonyms at trial.
3. A place, time, or situation characterized by the confluence of powerful intellectual, social, economic, or political forces: "Macroeconomics . . . was cast in the crucible of the Depression" (Peter Passell).

So by your own argument you should not have crucible race... On the other hand I like a bit of poetic license and find your usage quite fun.

What is language if you can't play with it?